December 22, 2005

(Ashley on a front porch on December 22, 2004 in Indiana; Ashley on a front porch on December 22, 2005 in Arizona)

(before Santa; after Santa; Ashley's backyard vision; December dandelion-picking)

(Benjamin alert, praying, with Mommy, with Grandpa, and dreaming)

(Casey alert, sleeping in heavenly peace, and posing as an astronaut)

(Danielle reads to Daddy, hangs out with Mommy and Casey, rolls her eyes at Casey, hangs out with Daddy and Casey, loves her Grandpa, and loves her brother and Grandma)

 

December 17, 2005

(Jim & Patricia Thomas show off Ashley and her hairdo)

(Benjamin cheesing, Benja-Claus)

(Casey shrugs off life, yawns, poses as Santa)

(Danielle wide awake, not wide awake, fast asleep with Mommy)

 

December 13, 2005

(Benjamin smiling, whistling, looking big in his bubble, reading Prince Caspian to Daddy, and displaying one of the cool embroidered blankets that Aunt Patricia and Uncle Jim had made for the babies)

(Casey holding his ears, holding Mommy, holding Aunt Patricia, and holding a pose)

(Bright-eyed Danielle imitates Santa, dries off after a bath, and just looks beautiful)

(Two Phoenix fine dining establishments that Jim Thomas and Phil hopefully didn't inspire)

Dear Friends & Family,

Thank you again for all of your expressions of kindness to us during these days.  Because of you, we realize each day how richly blessed we are.  Here’s what life for us looks like these days.

Still, three trips to the hospital a day—usually some combination of Lisa, the Thomases and me.  The babies have been very enjoyable to be with lately, with no major setbacks.  We have done a lot of holding and bath-giving with all the babies this week, and we are so grateful for wonderful doctors and nurses who have been extremely encouraging and patient with us.

Casey did take a small step backward by going back onto the CPAP (but this was not a surprise), and he should be able to give the nasal prongs another run here in the next week or so.  The important thing is that he builds some strength and gains some weight, so that his next nasal prong attempt will be more permanent.

The biggest news of our week is that Danielle took a huge step forward by going onto the CPAP, which means that her breathing tube is removed!  She has done very well with it.  Her breathing progress will still be slow because of lung issues that she experienced during her first week, but it looks like she will not have to revert back to the ventilator, which is a huge blessing for a number of reasons.  Please continue to pray for her continued breathing progress, and for a “peaceful resolution” of her brain bleed issues, and one which would not require any kind of temporary or permanent shunt.

Benjamin is still moving forward nicely—because his nasal prongs were drying out his nose, he was put in a humidifier hood (we call him “bubble boy”—see picture) to give him his oxygen and some extra humidity.  The best part about this is that he doesn’t even have to wear nasal prongs while he’s in it, so that we can see his face very clearly.  And as many of you commented after our last update, and as I think you’ll see again, all three of them are starting to “round out” some and look like “real babies” (even though our largest, ironically, has just now reached exactly half of Ashley’s birthweight!).

The babies’ weights, as of last night, were:  Benjamin—a whopping 3 lbs. 7 oz.; Danielle—an up-and-down 3 lbs. 1 oz.; and Casey—a just-shy-almost-but-not-quite 2 lbs. 15.8 oz.  We hope in a few hours to have three 3-lb. babies.

Yesterday, on the way out of the hospital, Lisa and I passed the Ancillary Labor and Delivery Unit, where Lisa spent the entire week leading up to the babies’ delivery.  As we were passing it, I spotted Tammy, one of the nurses in the unit, and flagged her down.  She marveled at how good Lisa looked, and remembered how terribly sick she had been, and how worried they had been about her (one of the worst pre-eclampsia cases that she had seen in 14 years, without even considering the cardiomyopathy the following week.)  After we finished talking with her, Lisa said, “Now who was she?” at which point my jaw dropped.  Tammy was actually Lisa’s personal nurse on November 4, who told us that we were going to deliver, who instructed us on what to expect, and who was the nurse in the delivery room with us delivering the babies.  We were both reminded again of how sick and “out of it” Lisa was during that whole week, and we are so grateful that she’s with us (even if she barely remembers that day at all!).

Jim and Patricia Thomas will be leaving us in a couple of days—they have been an enormous help, and Ashley has loved every minute with them.  Jim and Patricia have been friends since I was a young and foolish campus minister at the Christian Children’s Home of Ohio, where they were on the board (and then for a short time Jim came on staff and was my boss!).  Though they live in Indiana now, and we in Georgia, they have remained family to us, and have even pulled me overseas a couple of times to see the Children’s Home that Jim started in the Ukraine.

If you would, pray for the non-NICU members of our family.  Lisa and Ashley both had a short stomach bug of some kind this past week, but both felt better within 24 hours.  We think that we can endure just about anything at this point, but—admittedly—one of the hardest things for us to take would be if (due to sickness) we had to take a break from seeing the babies.  Right now, our trips to the NICU—regardless of what they may hold—are the highlights of each day.

Carter, whom we mentioned the other day, made it through his surgery well; his parents are grateful for any extra prayers for him.

We know that prayer has made a huge difference in our outcome, and we believe that God is pleased to hear us cry out to Him on behalf of anyone who has a need.  Thank you for including our little ones in those prayers.  We hope—this Christmas—that our little ones, and the wonder of the whole thing, and God’s provision for them, will be just one more piece of evidence to you that the baby in the manger was and is exactly who He claimed to be.

In Christ,

Phil, Lisa, Ashley, Benjamin, Casey, Danielle

& Emily (November 4-23, 2005)

P.S. Occasionally, there will be a few more pictures on the website (www.expandingrobertses.com) than what we could reasonably attach to an e-mail update.  That is certainly the case today.  Included in the update on the website are two pictorial examples of how—if our lives had taken a different course—Jim Thomas and I could have been restaurant proprietors here in Phoenix.  (All I can say is that finding alternate, not-necessarily-quicker routes to and from the hospital has sometimes been quite eye-opening.)

Dear Friends & Family,

Hello again!  We wanted to give you an update on what’s going on with us, and what you can pray for…

First of all, thank you so much for cards as well as for e-mails that many of you have sent to encourage us during this time.  They have been a true comfort to us.  Also, several of you have made donations to the fund that we set up for the quads, and also for a memorial project in Emily’s name—we don’t know the names of those who have made contributions, and so we just say a huge general thank you.

Earlier this week, we received an unexpected visit from Ashley’s almost-seven-year-old buddy and role model Raegen (daughter of our friend Emily Ackeberg).  She came by just to read Ashley a book that she had gotten for her, which is titled “My Baby Sister is a Preemie.”  Raegen read half of the book to Ashley (a new attention span world record), and it was ten times as sweet as the attached picture conveys.

In between three daily trips to the hospital, we have been working on re-establishing small doses of normalcy back into our lives, now that the remaining babies have somewhat stabilized and now that Lisa is feeling herself again.  Last week, we went with Lisa’s mom and our friend Julia to Zoo Lights, a huge Christmas light display which spans the entire Phoenix Zoo.  After church on Saturday evening, we snuck down to Central Avenue to see the first half hour of the Fiesta of Lights parade, which was quite exciting (especially the firetrucks).  And then last night the three of us went to the park, where Ashley mastered the slide.

Tonight, “Aunt” Patricia and “Uncle” Jim Thomas arrived from Evansville, Indiana.  All day long we had been quizzing Ashley on “Who’s coming to see you?”  with the correct answer “Uncle Jim and Aunt Patricia.”  We have also frequently quizzed her recently with the question, “What’s Christmas all about?” with the correct answer “Baby Jesus.”  When Jim and Patricia arrived, there may have been some confusion as to who Jim is and who Jesus is (Jim says it doesn’t happen very often), but we think we got it straightened out before bedtime.  We will see.

Anne Hart with The Savannah Morning News did a story on us in Saturday’s paper, which you can read at  http://savannahnow.com/stories/120405/3467468.shtml .  We appreciated her kindness in this long-distance coverage.

Oh, and the status of the gang is as follows: Benjamin was the first to hit the 3-pound mark two days ago, but stayed at 3 lb. last night and found himself leapfrogged by sister Danielle, who weighed in at 3 lb. 1 oz.  Casey is lagging a little behind at 2 lb. 9 oz., but all three of the babies are at full feeds, or close.  Benjamin today came off of his CPAP mask (an oxygen-regulating device), which was replaced by non-invasive nasal prongs in his nose that simply supplement him with a steady stream of oxygen.  Hopefully, he will not need to revert back to the CPAP.  Casey is still on the CPAP, but may be following close behind big brother Benjamin.  Danielle had a head ultrasound today to see how brain fluid is looking—we haven’t heard the results.  Pray also for her to respond quickly to a treatment of inhaled steroids, which will help her move off of the ventilator and down to the CPAP, which would be a huge move for her in light of her lung issues which she has had since birth.  Also, pray for her to—how shall I word this?—go #2, which will probably take her out of the weight gain lead but will help her be a little more regular, which would be a good thing.  And—for the rest of these babies’ lives—please pray for their protection from infections.

Julia Wingfield encouraged us to share this with you, so that you will know that the rough parts of our journey haven’t taken away our ability to laugh and enjoy the precious little lives that we’ve been entrusted with.  We have been giving a hard time to a couple of the NICU nurses (who are just about the most wonderful humans that we’ve ever met) because of a couple of outfits that the boys were wearing which were borderline girly.  They urged us to go buy the boys some gender-appropriate preemie clothes at Wal-Mart, which we did, but not before issuing a “Fashion Statement”, from the boys, outlining exactly what they would and wouldn’t tolerate.  There is a link to it on the December 2 update, on the website only, (www.expandingrobertses.com) if you would like to read it and see a couple of very manly pictures of Ben and Casey.

We love and appreciate all of you, and thank you so much for sharing our lives.  Your prayers and encouragement are still keeping us going.  Thank you.

In Christ,

Phil, Lisa, Ashley, Benjamin, Casey, Danielle

& Emily (November 4-23, 2005)

Dear Family & Friends,

Time for another update on what’s happening with us.

The gang turned four weeks old today.  They have all had a fairly good week, and certainly a low-stress one, which has been a much-desired luxury for the two of us.  Benjamin is weighing in at 2 lb. 15 oz., Danielle is 2 lb. 14 oz., and Casey is lagging behind at 2 lb. 7 oz.  It is hard to believe that we are so thrilled at the prospect of having our first 3-lb. baby on our hands, but right now three pounds seems HUGE.  All three of them have really looked good this week, and we’ve gotten to hold each of them frequently and even bathe them.  Danielle’s head has been doing okay the last few days—please pray that fluid will not expand significantly.

Emily was laid to rest on Wednesday in Savannah.  We had hoped for a very small burial service, and wanted there to be a small group of children in attendance—with not much time to plan, we simply asked the pastors on staff at Savannah Christian to attend the service along with their families.  Dave Allgire and my dad conducted the service, and a little more than a dozen children (all pastors’ kids like Emily, many of them quite young) placed flowers on her casket.  It was very hard not to be there personally, but we were so touched by the pictures and even just the thought of it.  In the two attached pictures are Caleb Romans (a big four-year-old these days) and Sophie Jobe (who was born this April) and her mother Marie.  For those of you who live in the Savannah area, we would welcome you to visit her gravesite, which is located in the Greenwich Cemetery which is part of Bonaventure Cemetery.  Again, we will be having a memorial service at some point after we return to Georgia.

Two wonderful helpers have been with us during the past week.  Lisa’s mom Patti (a.k.a. Nana) is leaving tomorrow after a week and a half with us.  And Julia Wingfield, one of Lisa’s best friends in the whole world, surprised Lisa on Tuesday by flying out here for three days.  Both of them were a huge comfort to us, and a huge help with Ashley.  Our dear friends Jim and Patricia Thomas are driving southwest from Evansville, Indiana to spend a week with us.

Ashley is more beautiful and more hilarious every day.  She had her first pigtail action this week (she referred to it as “hairdo”), she loves her toy cellphone (she refers to it as her “pusher”) and she is enjoying being chased by Daddy (okay, no one enjoys it more than I do).  She loves to help throw away trash and put laundry in the laundry basket and try on anyone’s shoes and dance and do puzzles and generally jump headfirst into whatever strikes her as exciting.

Thank you again for prayers for all of us.  We are holding up pretty well, and still see very clearly God’s grace throughout all of the ups and downs.  We appreciate you coming along for the ride…

In Christ,

Phil, Lisa, Ashley, Benjamin, Casey, Danielle

& Emily (November 4-23, 2005)

P.S. Special website-only bonus:  Julia thought that we should share with you something fun that we had done with the nurses in the NICU.  We were giving a couple of them a hard time about dressing the boys in some borderline-girly baby clothes, and so decided that we would release an official statement from Benjamin and Casey, a "Fashion Statement," which detailed the do's and don'ts of clothing baby boys in the NICU.  Click here to check it out!  It is a pretty big file and may take a few minutes to load!